Women who have been subjected to abuse face many challenges.
Fear
- Retaliation by the abuser, including increased or more severe violence
- Being charged criminally
- Not being believed
- Losing her children
- Harm to children, friends, family and/or pets
- Losing possessions
- Discrimination
- Being deported
- Being ostracized from her community
- Bringing shame on her family
- If in a same-gender relationship, fear of being outed
- Being denied access to food, water, medical treatment, health care, clothing, visitors
- Being institutionalized
- Being mishandled or restrained
Economic insecurity
- Losing financial resources such as benefits, income assistance and/or essential services
- Experiencing real or perceived vulnerability without male “protector”
- Limited availability of resources
- Difficulty finding/accessing services that are responsive to her needs
- Lack of awareness of rights
- Lack of access to or inability to use a telephone to call for help
- Lack of transportation or money to pay for transportation
- Lack of accessible information and educational materials
- Being financially dependent on the abuser
- Limited work experience and education
- Concerned about a change in economic status
- Having to apply for social assistance and raising her children in poverty
- Lack of available housing
Family and community
- Pressure from her family or community to stay in the relationship
- In rural areas, social service staff may be an immediate or extended-family member, a friend or an acquaintance
- Experiences of discrimination, homophobia, racism
- If the survivor and the abuser are part of a marginalized community, there may be a perception of disloyalty to the community – e.g., that the survivor is making lesbians look bad by speaking out about the abuse or going to the RCMP/police
Isolation
- Separation from friends, family, support networks
- Unable to speak English or French
- Lives in a rural or isolated community
Health/Physical
- Too physically exhausted to leave
- Fatigue from the stress of being subjected to abuse
- Suffering injury or disability from the abuse
- Develops Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD), anxiety, depression or other mental disorders
- Develops substance use issues
- Engages in self-destructive behaviour that may have health and safety risks
Shame
- Believes she is responsible for the abuse and the breakup
- Feels stigmatized for being a separated or divorced woman, for bringing shame on her community
- Feels shame about the sexual violence – believes she is “dirty” or “damaged goods,” that she “asked for it” or “didn’t say no clearly enough,” that no one else will want her
Personal beliefs and emotions
- Separation or divorce may be contrary to her beliefs
- Low self-worth, self-esteem and self-confidence
- Concerned about her children growing up in a “broken home”
- Continues to love and care for her partner and hopes that the relationship will improve
- Believes that abuse is normal because her mother was subjected to abuse
- Believes that there are no legal remedies to help her
- The woman, the abuser or others may minimize or deny the abuse
- Develops extreme, strongly held beliefs about herself, others or the world (e.g., “I must be a bad person if this happened to me” or “all men are bad” or “I can never trust anyone again”)